3 comments on “The Kavakian Empire – Part One Chapter 8a

  1. Well that was… odd. I can appreciate the fact that Seth is going to lie, and that likely it’ll be fairly obvious he’s doing so, but why the odd behavior? Also, what I get from the dialogue is distraction; Seth doesn’t seem to be paying full attention to his negotiations, otherwise his dodges of Robert’s questions would be better, right?

    • Hmmm. I intended Seth to create more problems, but I honestly didn’t develop his part well enough. I didn’t have one major antagonist in my story so I tended to have too many minor antagonists instead and they all tend to be too weak as a result. I’m not sure yet how I will fix this, but your input is helping me recognize the problems. Thanks 🙂

      • I actually like stories with multiple antagonists, so that’s not a detractor at all. I think if we can get each one to be a badass (or at least think he is) then you’ll really be in bushiness.

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