2 comments on “The Kavakian Empire – Part One Chapter 8b

  1. I actually feel a little perplexed with this chapter. I get what you wanted to do – set up Calloway as someone motivated by revenge and a potential threat to the boys’ safety, but it felt awkward. At this point everyone on the ship is already aware they have Tredon “guests” right? Wouldn’t Calloway have been anxious and driven to get as close to them as possible, assuming his revenge drive is his primary characteristic? Maybe this is something you’re going to lead into, but I felt even a single paragraph of background on where Calloway is coming from would be helpful in setting him up.

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